SHUT UP . . .

***  NOTE:  I wrote this before my morning coffee.  You've been warned.  Carry on.


1)  People who hate in the name of religion can shut the hell up.  Bombing abortion clinics to save lives?  Picketing military funerals in the name of God?  Teaching your children that there is only one God, one religion, one point of view and everyone else is wrong and a sinner?  Fighting to stop people from loving each other because they're the same sex?  Yeah.  Your ignorance is stinking up my world.  Shut the fuck up.


2)  People who say, "Yeah?  You think THAT'S bad . . ." and then completely circumvent everything someone's bleeding heart just told them and, instead, talk about themselves. It's a vile habit. You can't manage the smallest of humanitarian responses or displays of concern?  Not even a moment to comment on the other person's pain? You aren't able to restrain your self-importance long enough to offer a single reassuring word?  Really? Wow. Number 1:  you suck.  #2:  Shut the fuck up.


3)  People who don't know how to listen or empathize but barf out an immediate answer that is not an answer meant to help you. It's intended to shut you up because they don't want to hear it.  These non-answers are, "Well--it's all for the best."  "Ohh... you don't mean that."  "Things will look better tomorrow."  "God has a plan."  What is wrong with just looking at someone that is having a hard time and TELLING them, "Uhh.  That sucks, no doubt about it.  Is there anything I can do to help?"  For real, if you are unable to reply with something that makes THEM feel better instead of YOU, then shut the fuck up. 


4)  Parents who yell louder than their kids do in stores when they tell them to be quiet.  Parents who don't answer their kids when the kid is saying, "Mom...mom...mom...MOM!  Mom, mom, mom..." so the kid gets louder and louder until the mom finally responds.  Then the mom turns to you in the grocery line and says, smiling, "I don't know why he's so loud..."  Yeah.  Shut the fuck up . . . and take a parenting class for Christ's sake.


5)  People who give passive-aggressive compliments and never own up to them.  "Wow!  You look so much better since you lost all that weight!"  "I really like that hair color on you--it does a great job of hiding all your gray."  "Is that a stain on your shirt? (points to the stain)  Don't worry--it's not even noticeable."  "I just LOVE that you wear whatever you want and don't care what anybody thinks . . ."
Come on--if you're not secure enough to give a straight-up compliment sans the hidden barbs then don't say anything.  It's not innocent.  It's not an accident.  It's passive- aggressive and you DID mean for it to come out that way. . . you just didn't want to get called on it.  If you give me one of these razor-laden sweets, I WILL call you on it.  Bet on it.  So my advice to you is to shut the fuck up.


Okay.  This was written, as I warned earlier, before my morning coffee.  I am going to now go and ingest vast amounts of the miracle beverage.  Then, I will once again, be talking about butterflies and rainbows.  Until then, I'm thinking it's time that I shut the fuck up.