POST ONE There! Got everything switched over to my maiden
name, RIDLON. Linkedin, facebook, twitter, my blog, MY BOOK!!!
POST TWO Hooooly SHIT!! I’ve been fucking around with
changing everything to my maiden name and now my blog is gone. Gone-gone!!
WTF!! How the shit do I get it back????? DAMN!
POST THREE I have no blog address anymore. Mother-
POST FOUR Really? Really? This fucking computer is BEGGING to
be lit afire. Stupid blog!
POST FIVE Ok. Google+ is nice. They are good and true. They
have changed all that I have asked. HOO-raaah. Not so with blogger. Blogger is
vile and evil and doesn’t listen. At all. My book cover WAS CHANGED last
night!! I looked on Amazon and there it was—all changes had taken effect. Now
it just reverted. It just fucking reverted. On its own. GodDAMN I hate
computers. . .
POST SIX Ok. Ok. I have re-published my book TWICE in the
last week. TWICE it took the changes and then reverted back. Got ahold of the
Blogspot minions and they gave the sage advice of trying to republish it.
Really? Yes, I think I will. Re-publishing my book will be a new hobby. I’ll
drink coffee, smoke cigarettes, and spend my days re-publishing my book. Every morning.
Into eternity. THEN every night the blogger minions can sneak in and change it
back for no apparent reason. Sounds like FUN. I’m gonna go get my coffee and
smokes right this minute.
POST SEVEN My blog address refuses to change, too. URL.
Whatever the fuck. It lies to me. It says yes. “Yes, michelle, we heard you. We
are changing you over right this second. No, wait. Maybe not. Try it again. I’ll
do it this time for sure. PLEEEASE Charlie Brown?? Kick that football again—THIS
time it’ll go.” My hatred for disobedient computers is goddamn near
pathological. Now the blogger mechanics can kiss my ass too. CHANGE MY URL
ADDRESS, GODDAMNIT! Stupid blog.
POST EIGHT Breathe. . .breathe. . .easy in. . .breathe. . .easy
out. . .breathe. Nope. Still wanna make this computer into a fucking toaster.
All the breathing will just fan the flames and make the fire bigger. Good. Son
of a bitch. Stupid blogger.
POST NINE Now it’s going to take the Amazon mechanics at
Kindle a couple years to get back to me on why the changes won’t stick. If they
tell me to re-publish and I get their address? Yeah. I’m going to fucking prison.
POST TEN Going to prison for sure. Some 12 year old from the customer service just
emailed me saying he’ll “look into it” and get back to me on TUESDAY!!! (March
31) WHAT????? I’m being featured in the april/may edition of a women’s magazine
to promote my book. THE NAMES DON’T MATCH, GODDAMNIT!! I’ll be RIDLON in the
magazine and MATTILA in the bookstore. And I started writing these hacks to
help me at the beginning of the week. I’m going to stroke right the fuck out. I
know it.
POST ELEVEN Technically, I think Bailey’s is a coffee creamer. I’m
pretty sure of it. I’m going to get some goddamn cream. Stupid blogger.
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